RP:]] St Luke's Reform School For Young Gentlemen

Number of posts : 920 Age : 43 Registration date : 2008-04-01

"You don't have to worry about me at all, Cobes! It's just a brief momentary lapse of judgement. I don't want to be with you! I'm not interested in you like that." I reply, "My mind's just all over the fucking place with everything going on right now, that I'm thinking crazy things and they currently involve bending you over my desk and fucking you senseless!"

My temporary insanity also apparently involves me being way too loose with my tongue. This isn't going to end well.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to blurt it all out."

I blink a few times at his statement, I can't believe he actually said that. And what I also can't believe that I am actually a little aroused by his forwardness. I haven't heard someone say something like that to me in so long. Brian's way to sweet to talk to me like that.

"Fuck man, seriously, I..." I stutter before shaking my head and grabbing the door knob.

"Fuck..." I pull open the door and make my way out, rubbing my hand over my face as I start down the hallway at a power walking pace.

Number of posts : 920 Age : 43 Registration date : 2008-04-01

I don't think going after him would be the wisest idea now, as much as I want to. I don't want to leave this fight or whatever like this. I hate arguing with Coby, even thought we don't do it very often. No-one else can put up with my inner retard and outer sex godliness.

What the fuck am I even thinking anymore?!

I sit back on my bed and lay down, staring up at the ceiling, "This sucks."

I run down the hallway, down to the little staircase down to the old gym. The one that smells like old socks and peoples sweat, even though it hasn't being used for over three years, which is a little creepy.

I walk inside with a sigh, still trying to hold in the tears that have being threatening to fall for the past 5 minutes of me walking across campus.

I take a seat on one of the cobweb covered benches with a sigh, the tears now pin-pricking my eyes.

"Why does this have to happen to me?"

Number of posts : 920 Age : 43 Registration date : 2008-04-01

[[Heh, I dunno where to go from there. You want someone to find him? Bit of Coby cuddles?]]

[[I think that might be best. But who could we have? Hmmm...]]

Number of posts : 920 Age : 43 Registration date : 2008-04-01

[[I have Corey, Matt, Brian... erm... I can't remember anyone else. Hmmm...

]]

[[Right, we can have... *looks up admin panel* Matt, Brian, Corey, Mick, Tony? Hmmm... I can't think of anything myself, but maybe you can think of something tomorrow while I'm at college. The only person I can think of is probably Matt... or Corey? I don't know, haha.]]

[[Figured I'd throw Corey in there. He's not dead. He needs playing with. 'Sides Matt's got Alex to look after later.]]

I walk down the stairs, my bottle of whisky hid under my jacket. I can't deal with Brody right now. Or the influx of crying, grieving kids. I'd feel guilty for bailing out on them but I haven't had a moments peace in at least three days now. I'm living off of caffiene.

I head towards the old gym, the place myself and the other teachers normally go when we need to get ~~drunk~~ away. There are very rarely students here and when they are, they're normally pretty hospitable to us.

As I round the corner to the best smelling spot - and even that smells bad - I can see I'm not alone. The gravity defying spikes tell me there's only one person this could be.

"Coby?"

I look up with a gasp, wondering who could be down here too. It must be one of the teachers, everyone is pretty open to grieving at the moment. I just hope it is one of the teachers, I don't think I could deal with any of the kids finding me like this.

I stay silent for a little while until I see Corey round the corner to find where I am. I smile at him slightly.

"I was due a nervous breakdown sometime, right?"

"You've done well to last as long as you have." I say, smiling.

I walk across to where he's sat, dropping onto the bench next to him. I pull the bottle of whiskey out from under my jacket, insisting it's just to keep me warm.

"You need to get it all out?" I ask, "Coz you know my ears are always open."

I had come here to get away from everyone's problems but I can't help myself sometimes.

"I think sharing that whiskey is in order actually," I say with a laugh, wiping my eyes and sniffing.

I look over at Coby as he unscrews the bottle and takes a swig himself before handing it to me. I smile meekly before taking a swig for myself and coughing a little.

"I just don't think I can do this anymore," I sigh before passing the bottle back to him, "The whole leader of everyone, advice and shoulder-to-cry-on, go to guy I mean, not the drinking."

I nod along with what he's saying.

"You know, Coby, you're probably the best block leader this place has ever had." I say, sincerely. I can't count the amount of catastrophes he's helped to avert, "You just need to take a break. Tell the kids to sort their own problems out for a while. I'm sure they'd understand."

I take a long drink from the bottle, "Tell them it bulds character or some such shit."

"It doesn't work like that Corey," I say as I all but pull the bottle from his hands.

"When Tim was leader, the same thing happened with him. A crisis happened and he had had enough of the game. He wanted to pass the touch to someone else, he told some of the kids this, and they tore him apart. They didn't want anyone else, and it was carnage. Carnage that he then took out, on me."

I sigh remembering before taking a swig of the harsh liquid, "I don't want that to happen to me."

"The kids have changed a lot since Tim's time. They respect you, you give them answers which don't involve your penis." I say, moving back on the bench, "Besides you're not like him. You could handle any kind of backlash."

I take the whiskey back from him, he's going to end up drinking it all before I have chance to get drunk. That's not fair.

Corey has to pretty much wrestle the bottle away from me.

"It's only being a few years, the kids haven't changed that much. They are just blinded by their pain and their grieve and they think I'm not in pain either. They seem to think that I am some kind of robot," I say before looking back at Corey again.

"I bet that's why you are down here as well? The kids are getting to you?"

"You know me so well."

I can see him eying my whiskey. I push it behind me, glaring at him as I do so.

"I know exactly where you're coming from. Because you're older, you don't feel the loss so much. You're supposed to be used to this kind of thing. But you never get used to the pain of losing someone."

"Exactly!" I say, glad that someone in this place can finally understand where I am coming from.

"I mean, we all have our problems, but they all seem to think that just because I've finished puberty I now longer have the ability to cry."

I sigh as I watch the whiskey bottle come out of my sight.

"You know, I can hold my drink. It's not like it really matters around here anyway, besides, it's not like Brian would bitch at me," I can tell I am becoming a little tipsy now, not too much, just a little more... revealing of my secrets than I normally would be.

"Oh, I'm well aware of that. I'd just like some left for me too. You have any idea how hard it is to sneak this onto campus? No-one gives a fuck about it being here, they just want it all for themselves."

I take another long drink of it, satisfied I've got enough for a while and put it back between us.

"If anything we cry more than they do. You get a horny Brody anywhere near me and I'm a wreck in seconds." I shudder at the memories, "She's a scary chick."

I sigh a laugh before picking the bottle back up again and taking a long swig of the burning liquid for myself.

I make a hissing sound before wiping my mouth with the back of my hand and looking back at Corey.

"Y'know, I was thinking of giving up the hierarchy of being leader for good. I mean, we only have a few weeks before summer vacation, and I'll be out of here. Maybe Chris's death was a sign for me to step down, let someone younger and better take the honour."

"Yeah, you are." I say, just thinking on how soon everything's going to change here, "Well, if you want to be anyway."

Shit, I've sad too much. I grab the bottle and occupy my mouth with drinking. Brody and I were supposed to discuss this with him together. Instead I've just dropped a hint I can't take back.

"Maybe now would be an ideal time to train up a successor."

"Well, I need to think of Brian, don't I?" I say, "I mean, I can't just leave him, after everything we have being through, what I have made him into. It just wouldn't be fair."

I sigh as I look back at Corey, "I need to think of who would be a good leader. I mean, I was going to pick on Chris for it. But, that's not going to happen now. So, who's left?"

"I've never really thought about it." I admit, "I don't tend to think about that kind of thing when it comes to the students. More... well, I'm sure you know what I mean."

I might actually hate myself right now. Coby's trying to be serious and I'm thinking about satisfying my dick.

"What about Sanders? Or Baker? Maybe them sharing the burden between them?"

"I am not talking about sex Corey," I look at him sternly before snatching the bottle away from him once again, "I am talking about who's going to be here to be his boyfriend, if he wanted me for sex, I wouldn't need to worry. Not with that Black Thunder fucking Mick brought him for Christmas."

And that Coby would be over-sharing. I shake my head before taking a sip from the bottle. Deciding that now I am over-sharing it might be best if I pace myself a little.

"I was thinking that maybe Matt would be able to feel that position the best out of the two. I mean, he may be as sensitive as psychotherapist on Mary-Jane, but he's level-headed."

I am just trying to tick off all the good features for anyone that could take over my position. I should be weighing out the pros and the cons, but right now all I am looking for are the pros. I want out of this, now.

"Firstly, Brian would wait forever for you, you know that. He doesn't need to have someone around him at all times. You'd only be a phone call or an e-mail away if he needed you." I smirk a little, "Besides I could look after him if you're really concerned."

A quick look at Coby's face tells me that was the wrong thing to say, "I'm joking man, I've drunk half a bottle of whiskey in 20 minutes, I'm going to say bad things."

To highlight this, I take another long drink of the whiskey, "Y'know, maybe you should try a different approach? Perhaps having a few people up there to handle the whole team leader situation?"

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