RP:]] St Luke's Reform School For Young Gentlemen

"Mmm, I'm sure I can." I say in a floaty voice.

A smirk comes across my face as I press my nose to his neck and start swaying us both.

"Why? Does that mean you will? Because, if sooooo..." I say as my slides down his front to his belt buckle.

"Maybe I can help."

Come on Brian. It's being almost three months now. You've gotta be ready by now. I want to taste you so badly.

I tense a little under his grip, "I... think I'll just stay clothed for now."

I'm annoyed at myself for not being able to do anything with him yet. I wish I could, I don't want to lose him because he just can't wait for me. I don't see myself ever having this connection with anyone else. After only a few short months, I already can't see myself with anyone else.

Part of me thinks I should stop being such a pussy and just get it over with. But then, I don't want to push myself in case I completely freak out on him in the heat of the moment. I also don't want to just get it over with. I want everything we do together to be perfect and incredible, the way it should be.

"I'm sorry, Coby."

I sigh and let my hands drop from his belt buckle and just rest on his hips.

Crash and burn again Coby.

"OK. But, can't I at least ravish you instead? You can't expect me to let you stay in this room and not let me touch you."

OK. That sounded a hell of a lot worse than it was meant to. I sure as hell didn't mean it like I said it but I hope that he doesn't think too innocently about it.

"Way to make me feel like a whore there, babe." I say, laughing a little to attempt to ease the tension.

I don't think I could really be opposed to a good, hard ravishing. I mean, it's not as if it's anything too sexual and it's only fair. Besides, I like the feeling of Coby throwing all his attentions on me, his hands, lips, the rest of him.

"I think that would be acceptable." I say, smirking a little.

And who knows what might become of that? I might feel comfortable enough to let something else happen. I hope so at least, being able to go a step further with Coby would be one of the better ways to say 'goodbye'.

I grin like a Cheshire cat, glad that I haven't put my foot in it, again, and also because he's finally letting me give him a good old ravishing. Granted, it may not be much, but I can get a few sneaky touches in, just to see what his moans, groans and whimpers sounds like.

Yes, I am a way for a noisy partner thank you very much.

I let my hands unlace from around Brian's waist as I walk around in front of him, pushing him gently away from his suitcase and small bed. I push him onto my bed with a swift motion before hitching my towel up a little more, making sure it's not likely to come off unless someone wants it too.

I smirk down on Brian and climb a stride his lap.

"So, what exactly should I be touching? Hmm? Your- nipples, maybe?" I ask him.

I snake my hands from my hips up to his chest, pinching at his visible nipples through the tight fabric of his clothes. Seeing what that will do for him.

I whimper a little as he pinches at my nipples, I've never had that done before, as sad as that seems. I nod in approval.

"That's, that's a pretty good start." I say, laughing a little at the sheer stupidity of my response to that.

I'm feeling more relaxed already, despite the fact he's practically naked on top of me. I smile up at him, moving my own hands to rub at his barely exposed legs.

"And where else do you think you should be touching?"

I'd guide him myself but I don't actually have any idea of where I want touching, what I want him to try. I can't believe I'm really this clueless.

In other words, I don't know, please show me what I like! I love how innocent he is, it means I can teach him all these amazing things, watch him blush when he moans with no limitations for the first time. I love it.

"Well, I have an iddy-biddy feeling that you'd like this." I say as I move my hands from his nipples.

I watch his eyes move as I move my hands down his chest to the hem off his shirt, smirking when I see his throat gulp as I run my hands under the fabric.

I break away from looking at his eyes as I look down at the task in hand, I push his shirt up his slender boy, admiring what is all mine as I push his shirt right up above his nipples. I smile when I see how perked up they are.

"Yeah, you are going to love this." I say as I dip my head down.

I take one of his nipples into my mouth, licking over it as I hold his shirt gently in place with my hand.

What the...? That feels good, that feels better than I'd imagined it would. I'd never understood the obsession with nipples, I could never illicit any kind of response from myself. Now I understand why it seems to be such a big turn on.

"Mm, yeah, I like that..."

I'm almost embarassed, I feel like a dirty porno. A quick look at Coby and the dirty part goes away. How could anything I do with this guy be considered dirty? It's perfect and sweet and amazing. Even if it is 'against nature'.

I'm highly intrigued as to what else he has in mind.

Sure, he'll feel nice if I carry on doing this, but he won't feel the amazingly toe curling pleasure that he deserves so much.

I tilt my head so I am now suckling on his other nipple, squeezing his abs as I do so, falling in love with the little whimpers of approval I hear him make.

"Do you like this, Brian? Do you want more?" I ask him, lifting my head up just above his heaving chest.

I look up at him and smile at him. What kind of 'more' was I thinking of here?

I answer without even thinking about it. Yes, I want more. I want to feel him against me, I want to see what else his mouth can do. I don't want to be afraid of it anymore.

"Yes..." I say, looking down at him, "I... I want more."

As soon as the words have left my mouth, I'm left wondering if this was a good idea. I don't know what he has in mind, I don't know if I'm ready to go the whole way but most of all, I don't know if I could handle doing anything back to him. I don't want it to be all 'take, take, take'. I want to make him feel good too, but I wouldn't know how.

"I think..."

I think? What is there to think about? Do you want me to make you come? Yes. That's not a lot! Well, it isn't to me but that's only because I just want to make him feel so good so badly.

"There's no thinking about it Sweetie. You're going to love it." I say as I climb from his lap.

I still leaving one of my legs swung over with my dick pressing into the rough denim of his jeans to his side giving me all sorts of thrills.

I scoot up a little so I am now face to face with him. I smile at him and place my hand on his still exposed stomach. I move closer to his face and start kissing him, starting a little more feverishly than we usual do.

Any nerves I had felt are washed away by the feeling of Coby's lips on mine. His kisses have the weird ability to make everything feel okay. Nothing's scary when I'm being kissed by him. I kiss him back, matching his intense movements.

I can feel his hand on my stomach, lower than normal. We've never really explored below the belt, short of the occasional ass groping. I'm pretty certain that's all about to change, I just hope I can handle it. Hope I don't start having flashbacks or completely screwing everything up for him.

I can hear myself softly moaning into his mouth. I like these heavier kisses, I can feel myself getting more turned on by the minute, the blood pooling between my legs.

I groan as I rub my now hard dick against his jean clad leg, still kissing him deeply, all tongues, teeth, lips, hell, even tonsils we're that deep.

I move my hand slowly but gently down his stomach, just wanting to feel his dick under my touch but at the same time I don't want to totally freak him out. So, I think I'll just do a little bit of between the clothes groping. I mean, what's the harm of jizzed up briefs anyway?

As I roll my hand over the bulge in his jeans, I feel him gasp into my mouth. Someone is just as turned on as me hear and just listening to him is making my cock twitch and beg for contact.

I break away from the kiss for a second, just to breath but I can see that he needed that too. I continue to paw at the front of his jeans, resting my forehead against his and just looking at into his eyes. Hoping never to find signs of embarrassment or fear.

This feels intense. It's scary and a little weird but it's so good too. His hand, even through the denim, is sending amazing shockwaves of pleasure through me.

I'm 16, I'm easy to please.

I grin goofily as I watch him looking at me, "Hi there."

It's corny, it's possibly the most stupid thing I could say but I can't resist it. He's turned me into a complete loser. The things this guy does to me. It's almost unreal.

I can feel his hard-on pressing against me. I kind of want to do something about it, to help him out a little but I'm still a little nervous about touching another man's dick. As if just getting jerked off, kissed and hard for another man isn't enough to make me gay. Touching him would be crossing a line I'm not sure I'm ready to cross yet.

The feeling of his jeans against my dick is still immense. I'm pretty sure that the towel that was gracing my hips has now fallen off due to the movement I'm going right into down there.

I keep pawing at Brian's jeans, loving the response that I'm getting from him. The whispers, the whimpers and the cat like meows are enough to make me take his hand and force it to grip me and let me fuck it violently, but I will remain controlled. For him.

I smirk at him, "So, you like this? Want me to go a little bit more... intimate?" I ask him, hoping that he gets me drift.

More intimate? I'm not sure I'm ready for that. Skin on skin might be a little too much. God, I hate how chick-like and whiny I'm sounding in my own head. Coby's not going to hurt me. He'd treat me like a fucking princess. I should be honoured that someone as beautiful and perfect as him wants to be this close to me. Willingly. It's about time I get over this fear. I can't spend all of our relationship too afraid to be touched by him.

I nod at him, "Yeah..."

I lift my hands to run them along his toned arms, "I want to see what other delights you have to offer."

I'm glad to see that he's not scared anymore and he's actually willing to go a little bit further with me. I grin and kiss his lips softly, just a small peck.

"I'll make you feel so good, seriously." I grin.

I look down at my hand on Brian's jeans. I smile and pop the button on his jeans and pull the zipper down slowly. I watch as he lifts his hips a little so I can slip them off a little easier.

I look up at him again, just to make sure that he's still OK with this.

"Further?"

"Yeah." I say, grinning now.

I'm still a little afraid but if I can beat this fear, I can be completely intimate with him and fuck, I want that more than anything. I've dreamt about it, seeing him as he's overcome with pleasure, the way he'd respond to my every touch, the way his face would look, the way he'd sound, the way he'd taste. I can feel myself going a little red while my dick twitches almost simoultaneously as I remember the dream I had about that. How is there enough blood to do both?

My breath hitches in my throat as I see where his hand is moving now.

Dirty, dirty fucking faggot...

I bite my lip and screw my eyes shut, trying to shut the voice out of my head. No, not now, not when I'm so close to getting over the fear...

I bite my lip as I pull of his briefs from his hips. I take in the whole package and grin down at him. God, I must look like a perv right now but I am just so happy.

"You really are going to love this Brian. I'm going to make it so good for you." I say as I reach my hand down to his dick.

I hold it loosely in my hand, starting to jack him off slowly, loving the way he's tensing up under my touch.

"God Brian, you're so big. I'm almost jealous." I grin as I look back up at him.

I try to bring myself away from the memories, from the flashbacks. I need to focus on Coby now, on how good his simple touches are making me feel. I clear my mind and look down at him, watching how happy this is making him. His face is all eager and excited. It's sweet yet incredibly fucking sexy.

I'm trying not to be too loud around him. I don't want to embarrass myself by moaning at a tiny little amount of pleasure when there's so much more to come.

"Coby, baby..."

You're just like him, that sick, filthy pervert.

I continue just staring down into Coby's bright eyes, they've made me feel better throughout all the nightmares. Why aren't they helping me now?

Is that what you want, Brian? You want to go to hell?

"No, no..." I mutter under my breath, my eyes falling shut.

I'll fucking show you what happens to faggots like him, like you.

The pleasure's taken a back seat now. My minds just been flooded with his harsh words, his sick promises. I feel physically sick and I can feel the tears pricking the back of my eyes.

"Coby, please..." I mutter, trying to squirm away.

I furrow my brow in confusion as I look up at Brian. I take my hand away from him slowly and press that hand to his chest.

"Bri, baby. What's wrong? I-I'm sorry, I didn't-push you, did I?" I ask, a little scared now.

Shit. He didn't want this, did he? He just said yes so that I'd shut up and be happy. Oh God. I feel so bad now.

"Baby. I'm sorry. I- I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you. I wasn't thinking- I'm a terrible boyfriend for not thinking how hard this must be...I'm just so sorry."

God, I feel so guilty now.

I shake my head and try desperately hard to keep my tears in check.

"It's not your fault. I wanted this, I did, really. I can't exactly fake an erection, can I?" I say, smiling weakly, "I just, I can't, Coby. I'm not ready."

I sit up and pull the pillow from under my head, covering up my withering arousal. I wipe at my watering eyes, looking down at Coby, "I'm sorry I'm being so fucking weird on you. It's just... really fucking messed up."

I want to tell him what happened to me, what keeps happening to me. I want to get it all out so he doesn't think I'm just screwing him around. I'm not sure I can find the right words though.

"I... I was..." This is another time where my hands wave in an attempt to illustrate my point, "As... as a kid."

My eyes widen at him, did he just say what I think he did?

I pull my towel over my now forgotten hard-on as I think of how I could comfort him.

"Oh my GOD Brian, I... I'm so sorry I- Baby, I,er..."

I have never being good in situations like this. I have no idea what to say to him. My mind is telling me to hug him, to show him that it doesn't matter, that you still want to hold him and make it better but I'm frozen in this position. I have never known anyone that was sexual abused as a kid.

I wish it was as simple as all that. Just the typical boy-gets-raped story but nope, there's so much more to it. I brace myself to finish the rest of it. I need to get the rest of it out. I want Coby to hear the whole story, he's the only person I can trust with it.

"I don't exactly remember much of it. Just... pain and hushed words - our little secret." I say, head bowed, "But my dad was the one who did it. My real dad. Not the guy I live with now, he's technically my uncle."

I sound like a bad Jerry Springer episode.

"My mom had an affair with her husbands brother and I was the result." I explain, trying to make this a little clearer, "My real dad had always been a little... fucked in the head. None of us knew why. He'd been screwing around with me since I was 5, thinking I was just his nephew, there was no real harm."

I look down at Coby, trying to figure the words to finish this off. I'm beginning to confuse myself now if I'm honest and I was there the whole time.

"Somehow, my dad discovered I wasn't his son and... fuck, all hell broke loose. My real dad apparently was of the mentality that sodomizing his young nephew was fucking fine but his son, that was sick and wrong. He wouldn't go anywhere near me. The man I thought was my dad also wouldn't go anywhere near me, he shunned me because I wasn't his."

I take a deep breath, wanting to get this all out as fast as possible before I'm unable to finish it and I end up crawling back into my shell.

"It got out that my real dad had been abusing me. I think I told someone, I'm not sure. I've pretty much repressed everything. Hence the nightmares.

"My dad went fucking insane. He couldn't believe someone in his family was so fucked up." I explain, my voice threatening to break, "Only it wasn't his brother that he was mad at."

I smile sadly, "It was me."

I pull my knees up to my chest, hugging the pillow close to me, "He went fucking crazy. Screaming and hitting me. Since then he's treated me like a lost cause, a complete and utter fuckup. He instilled homophobia in me just to try and make me a remotely decent man. He threw my mom out, convinced she'd made me a slut. At 5, I was a slut. So yeah..."

I smile sadly at Coby, "That's why I'm kinda... weird. I'm sorry. I really am..."

I have no idea what to say to him. All I can do is just bite my lip and wrap my arms around him, hugging him as close to me as possible. How could someone treat someone so perfect as him so badly?

"GOD, you don't need to be sorry. HE is the one that should be sorry, for hurting you, my poor Baby." I'm nearly in tears here over this.

I'm so worried about him now, i don't want him to go away to that man for Christmas now. I want him to stay here and be save.

I pull away from the hug and hold onto his hands, trying my hardest not to cry. But that's always being a weakness with me, when my friends cry, so do I. I laugh this off a little before looking back at him.

"Look at me, eh? You're all strong and I'm here almost blubbering like a baby." I smile before looking down at our joined hands again. I bite my lip and look back at Brian sadly.

"Please don't go home for Christmas."

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